I am trying to sleep

Shhhh! I am trying to sleep

Sleep is a funny thing. I know that I need sleep, but I have often resented the time that it takes up. This is silly as I know that our brains work when we are asleep and the work that they do is vital to the functionality that we get during our waking hours. However, feeling like there are not enough hours in the day means that it is always so tempting to borrow a couple from the part assigned to sleep. I have had a bedtime imposed upon me for a while now for this very reason. A number […]

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Self-harm has become a wellbeing issue which has been in the spotlight for a while now. I think with the rise of social media, it is something that is spoken about more openly and that is a good thing. However, I also think that self-harm is probably about as misunderstood and misrepresented in the media as alternative relationship dynamics, such as the ones that many of us choose to follow. I have also come across a lot of people who are into BDSM who have also self-harmed at some point in the past. What is Self-harm Self-harm is any sort […]

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eating disorders

Skeleton in my closet: eating issues undressed

The prompt for SB4MH this week is eating disorders. Actually, it is National Eating Disorder Awareness week, so it seemed a good time to write about this topic. It is something I have touched on before. I have been open from the beginning of this blog about the issues I have around body image and in my post Healing, I went way past what I had told myself I would ever reveal. Although I feel shame, that was not what kept me from talking about it, it was more that I felt I had moved past that unhappy time of […]

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Children Mental Health

Helicopters, Snow ploughs and Resilience

A big part of my job is in supporting children with their mental health. This is not an easy thing to do for a number of reasons. Firstly I am not a clinical psychologist, although that would certainly make things easier. And secondly, there is a growing number of young people requiring support so the demand for help can be a little overwhelming. According to the Mental Health Foundation, statistically now in the UK mental health problems affect about 1 in 10 children and young people. These figures account for those receiving specialist support for a mental health issue but […]

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Laughter and Orgasms

I know they say that laughter is the best medicine and really this is not such a surprise. But when I tried to think of things which had made me laugh this week, I found it quite hard. That is not to say that I don’t laugh, but it tends to be at circumstantial things and they are not always what others would find humourous. In addition, some of the things I laugh about are not very PC. I have a dry sense of humour, sometimes a bit dark and often a little naughty. You can see where I am […]

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At of listening

The Art of Listening

A really important part of a successful relationship is effective communication. Although we begin learning how to communicate with those who are around about us and will support us and meet our needs from a very young age, many of us are not truly effective at communication. Communication is a two way thing which involves listening as well as talking, therefore it is important that you are able to receive information as well as to send it. For lots of us, we tend to practice one much more than the other. Some people find talking about themselves and their feelings […]

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Control Freak

The biggest challenge to my mental health is control. Ironic for a submissive who has relinquished control of a number aspects of my life that this should be the case. Or perhaps, it is not an irony after all. Perhaps it makes a lot of sense and perhaps the requirement to submit to a strong man was what I needed all along. Before I submitted, I was a self-confessed control freak. I don’t know if I really believed it but it was what others said of me, so I owned it and bandied it around, half with disgust and half […]

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Posts puppies and pubes - picture of woman swimming in white dress

Posts, Puppies and Pubes

So it turned out that I took a break from writing posts last week. This was not planned, it just sort of happened. But it has made me think, once I got over my feeling of guilt that is. And that is it! Why was I feeling guilty about something which is fun? Blogging is something that I want to do. Something which makes me, me. The answer? Because I am me and beating myself up is what I do. But I have to stop. I have to take stock. So here I am, doing what I do and using […]

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