Edge Play

On the Edge play

Content Notice: This post contains details of edge play including knife play, needle play, CNC and breath play.

What is edgy for one is not necessarily edgy for another and this post has come at a time when I am not feeling at my most edgy. So consider this a beginner’s introduction to my own personal experience with edge play. Nothing we have done to date has gone too deep. That does not mean that I wouldn’t want it to, but circumstances have taken us in a different direction so we have spent more time working on the middle than pushing at the edges.

I do expect we will go back there but for the meantime, we have been content to push a little at lots of different things, rather than really seeing how far we can go with one. I imagine that a lot of couples are like this. Not because I imagine that it is only couples who play like this, but because the nature of a long term full time dynamic means that there is much more to to it than the just the play. I suppose often it comes down to the practicalities and if you are not a frequenter of clubs or events (we have an online community because this is not an option for us) then it can change the focus.

I think it is for this reason that we have dabbled rather than immersed ourselves in some of the things that we would consider edge play. There are certainly things that we will revisit and there are others that we plan to try at some point in the future, probably when we have more time on our own. I also think it can be different in a married dynamic as the level of trust is different to what it would be if you were playing with a stranger. It means that you probably are more cautious in some areas because there are other aspects to your relationship, but might also mean that you are able to push further in others without it feeling as dangerous as it might do in a different situation.

Knife Play

We have experimented a little with knife play. The first time HL used it as a bit of a mind fuck but I was so trusting that I never assumed that he actually had a knife. I was pretty shocked afterwards when he confirmed it, but he probably didn’t get the edge that he sought in the moment. Since then we have used it again and I do like the slight fear that the thought of the risk creates. We have talked about cutting and I think that for me, that would definitely take things up a level. But while this is something that part of me really wants to try, there is another part that knows I would not want the sort of marks that it would leave, and so it would probably be more of a try for a thrill rather than more.

This post is about what happened when we tried knife play:
Playing it down

Needle Play

Needle play is an edge kink that we have tried a few times. We were lucky enough to be invited to watch sub bee and the Bee Keeper, experienced needle players, and this inspired and encouraged us that it was something we could try. I do enjoy needle play but for some reason we have done much less of it that we would have expected and I am not too sure why. I don’t think there is a reason really and I would like to be able to have a longer session than the ones so far. I think it was a big step for HL and he was quite cautious so to be able to do it long enough that we can both relax into is something which we definitely plan for the future.

If you are interested then you might want to check out these posts I have written about our experience:
Needle Play: Just a few small pricks
Pine Needle Play
Needle Play – the ins and the outs

Breath Play

I have not written about breath play before as a topic but I realise now that it is something that I should probably write about. There are lots of different ways to use breath play but what we have done is for HL to limit the air I have by putting his hands around my throat. I suppose it is strangulation but it feels really nice and very hot so I don’t tend to think of it that way. It can also make me dizzy as he keeps doing it for long enough for me to start to wonder if he will remember to let go in time. I think that is what I find hot about it. It is definitely about feeling vulnerable and losing control.

The same sort of thing can happen when we use the hood as it also restricts my breathing a bit and can add to the feelings and the sensory overload. Actual breath play is different though as it gives a sort of head rush and this works especially well if it happens when I am about to orgasm and he puts his hand over my mouth. I sort of hold my breath anyway so it works to add to that in terms of the loss of control and the inability to do anything more than make some muffled noises.

As I said, I haven’t written about breath play before but this post is about when we used the hood if that is of any interest:
The New Hood – A peek inside

CNC

The last type of edge play I wanted to include was consensual non consent. This is a tricky one as consent is pretty much always there for us but with this type of play we tend to push things further and I will fight back a bit. Sexually I do enjoy the thrill of the chase and I also like being over powered. We are not into rape fantasy and such so have tended to use this for rougher play or for role play. This an area where we have lots of ideas of things we would like to do which involve a bit of a chase, with a capture and some overpowering. We do talk about taking this outside which might be fun.

This post is about one of the times we did a CNC Roleplay:
Consensual-non-consent

Mummification

We have also tried mummification. I don’t know if it counts as edge play but it felt quite exciting. Although you can use various sorts of material, we used cling film and HL cut little slits in it with a knife. Both parts of it felt thrilling. I was so vulnerable and unable to move at all and then I could feel what I thought would be a knife, but was actually scissors, cutting and slicing and then his fingers entering the gaps he had made in the tight casing.

This post is about the first time that we tried mummification:
Mummification Monday for missy

Being safe is important with any form of play but particularly with edge play where you are pushing or working right up at the edge of your boundaries. Communication is vital and so is thinking about Consent, Safety and Aftercare.

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25 Comments

    • Thanks Swirly. I had changed the picture at the last minute and overlooked the fact it counter-acted the CN so thank you. I will try to remember next time to check ❤️

    • Thank you sweet. We don’t do a lot of edge play but tired to include some of the stuff we have done 😊

  1. Somehow I didn’t realise that needle play and CNC were also edge play! I thought this was very interesting and useful for people to read that don’t know much about edge play and I like that we were given an insight into how it plays a part in your dynamic

    • I think that what counts as edge play is different for different people as it’s about what is on the edge of safe, sane and consensual for you. We are really very mild and certainly what we do probably wouldn’t be seen as edgy by many. But I guess for others it might be. I am glad that you found it useful though. You definitely go further with your caning than I ever could so we are probably quite tame but it works for us. Thank you 😊

      • That makes sense! I think it’s interesting though because it puts things in a different perspective. And everything is subjective in that I might be able to cope better with the pain from caning as compared to something you might cope better with!

  2. I thought your point regarding knife play was very relevant. If the reason someone engages in edge play activities is for the rush of fear, then is it still really edge play when the trust in the partner is absolute and fear is not, or rarely, a factor ?

    I really would love to try breath play, but I have nasal cartilage that can block the air passage. That’s created a phobia with a hard limit that my domme will never try to breach. I’ve reached that place with her that you describe with HL. Edge play activities have no fear factor but I sure can enjoy them for what they are (and the pain). 🌹🌹

    • Thanks Melody. I think I am happy with this place although sometimes I think it’s easy to stick in the comfort zone. I think if our circumstances change and we have more time alone then we will probably explore some of it more deeply but for now we are happy 😊

  3. I can understand the hesitation when it comes to edge play with a partner you love and trust. As much as you want to push them you don’t want to take it too far. Seems like you’re going the best way about it.

    • Yes I think it’s odd as in some ways the trust is such that you can go further without feeling concern and in others there is the hesitation. HL has saks that he needs to see me as his sub and not as his wife but sometimes it’s hard to separate 😊

  4. ohh glad u did the fold down pics. Needles do make me wriggle – I would have coped, being a responsible adult but it is very considerate of you Missy. Not sure about mummification! But very much appreciate your adventurous side x

    • I am faulty enjoyed the mummification. I think HL worried as he could see me heating up but it felt nice. We need to try it a bit more though. Thanks for commenting 😊

  5. Ironically, I’ve experienced majority of the activities detailed but they were never pre agreed with me, discussed afterwards or given opportunity to share my lack of understanding.

    It’s an interesting prompt, you’ve set out the information well

    Swirly

    • That would be totally different in that case and I can only seeing that being frightening. Communication before, during and after is paramount as that is where the trust, respect and ultimately the connection comes from. I am sorry that it happened this way for you swirly ❤️

  6. We haven’t done much edge play, other than a bit of knife play once or twice. I do like the feeling of being on the edge, of not knowing what will happen and putting my utmost trust in Master T 🙂

    Rebel xox

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