dreams

I have spread my dreams under your feet

I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.

These lines are taken from one of my favourite poems, The Cloths of Heaven by W B Yeats. I wrote a short piece about the poem before and when I did, described my dreams as being the most personal, secret and fragile part of me.  I still feel that is the truth. So often we hide our dreams, I think from fear that speaking them will reveal too much, or make us too vulnerable. In some ways there is something magical about dreams. They belong almost to another world, not the one of the rational and the here and now. For this reason, I think that perhaps people keep their dreams to themselves, for fear of tarnishing them or temping fate in some way.

The relationship that we are in leaves very little space to hide. It is a condition that I communicate honestly and openly and that includes sharing details of my thoughts and my dreams, my hopes and fears. Without this, we would not have the intimacy and the connection that we do. We would not be able step some of the way to realising some of those dreams for each other and in doing so, create the intensity that we are lucky enough to experience either. It is not easy to do though. I feel a reluctance sometimes, even now, to open myself up in this sort of way. The trust that is required in the other person is immense, as is the vulnerability that you find you have to show.

To let him tread on my dreams is huge. To say that they are his and that he can walk the path upon them was quite a step for me. To hand over my innermost fears and explore my dreams and nightmares with him was not something I never thought I would be able to do.  It challenged my self-sufficiency and it forced me to let him move past the natural defences that I used to protect myself inside. For us this has been a good thing. It has made us stronger and it has made me stronger. It is ironic that in opening myself up to being vulnerable, I have developed a strength and a solidity which wasn’t there before.

I have learnt a lot from allowing myself to have needs and allowing someone else to meet them. I have grown in myself in ways that I could not have foreseen. I have discovered and uncovered things which I didn’t know were there and found unspoken dreams being brought slowly to life, moving from something illusive and abstract, to something much more tangible. In laying my dreams at his feet I have put myself in a position where the can be brought to life in a much more real way than could have happened before. It is a risk, yes, but one that I am willing to take.

 

#F4TFriday

 

Other related posts:

Fear of acceptance
Together in Electric Dreams

 

Posted in Building a D/s Dynamic.

7 Comments

  1. Yes…vulnerability and intimacy is always such a risk. But until D/s, we never even came close to this kind of relationship. It changes everything and somehow makes you let the other in to places you’ve never let someone go before.

  2. I agree that dreams are really a very fragile part of us – like that as if we had such thoughts in reality we may find it difficult to cope with them. I do understand that letting yourself be vulnerable can make you stronger. The risk is difficult though x

    • It is difficult and I am not sure I would ever have taken it before I was in this situation. When I met HL I was of the mind that I didn’t need him. I wanted him of course. I have learnt to depend on him a little more and allow myself to be a little more needy for him. I think being exposed in that way means that you can also expose yourself in other ways and sharing hopes and dreams has been on of those ?

  3. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I had not really thought about the risks and vulnerability that come with sharing your dreams. I’m glad you find it worth the risk — I have not yet managed to share more than glimpses of my dreams.

    • Thank you Francesca. It has taken me a while. I think it is a slow process of become more exposed to someone and when there is compete acceptance with each step it makes it a lot easier. It has pushed out relationship onto a different level than it would have been otherwise ?

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