We seem to take a perverse kind of pleasure about making ourselves feel bad about ourselves. In an attempt to redress the balance, even just a little, this week we are focussing on our good bits.
What bit (or bits) of your body do you like (or at the very least, don’t feel too negatively inclined toward)? Why do you feel that way?
I like the fact that I am quite tall and I quite like my legs. The are longish and I think that this helps. I know that thighs can feel like a problem area for some but I have never really worried about mine. They have been more and less toned at different points in my life but generally I think they are pretty ok. I am at an age now where I flash less leg than I used to, but in the right environment, I would still quite willingly get them out and not worry too much about them.
What bits of you have others (friends, partners, etc.) told you they liked? Did they tell you why they liked them?
Two parts of my body that HisLordship likes are my bum and my breasts/nipples. It is interesting because these are parts that I struggled with and have learnt to love a bit more thanks to his persistence in liking them.
My nipples were always very ‘reactive’; they attracted comments when I was younger and I would rather not have had attention drawn to them in that way. I can remember being delighted when I discovered the invention of ‘The T-Shirt Bra’ and that helped a lot. Having fed three children for a year each, my nipples and breasts bore the wear and tear. I think that expressing milk, as well as feeding for so long, left me with nipples which I joked I could hang coats from. I respected and defended them as a good pair of working boobs but ultimately I found it hard to like anything about them. I was surprised that Sir liked them and found it hard to believe initially. Like I said, he did persist, and also brought my head around to enjoying and responding to nipple play. Posting my Funny Bunnies picture and not receiving comments like I expected – “What the hell happened to your nips?” – gave me a real boost too. It has helped me to accept that maybe they are ok after all.
When I met Sir, I also hated my bum. It was too wide and flat. I had been accused of having “childbearing hips” and called “pear-shaped” for long enough to know that mine wasn’t the body that would be lusted after. I avoided having my back to Sir when I was naked so that he wouldn’t see my big white wibble, wobble. Then came the spanking and OMG I loved it. He loved it too and it became a real turn on to have attention paid to that part of me. My bum was one of the first pictures that he posted (see above) and it really is a reflection of how much more acceptable he has made it to me.
How do you feel when someone compliments your body, particularly a bit that you yourself are less keen on?
This tends not to happen. The part that I hate most is my stomach and it doesn’t really draw compliments. In truth I still hide the parts that I hate the most and find it really difficult to look at pictures which show it all, never mind put them out there. I know that HL is ok with my stomach and I can sort of be ok with it now too as long as it is hidden away. When we fall asleep he will spoon me and lay his arm over me to land on my stomach. I will always move it up to my breasts and push back in to snuggle into him so there is still a lot of avoidance.
Generally I do not like my body and so when I receive compliments it is hard not to argue against them. I have come to realise how rude this is and that it is far kinder to accept the comments with the good intent in which they were made, rather than pile my own shit on top of them. Sir made it a rule a while back that I wasn’t to say negative things and put myself down and that I was to accept compliments graciously when they were given. This is something that I do, not just with regard to my body, but with all of my achievements and accomplishments.
The compliments on the pictures I have posted here have helped a lot with my body issues. Receiving them has reinforced what Sir has been telling me for years in that people really don’t notice the bad stuff that I can see. They seem to see the positives and more than that, take the time to let me know that is what they can see so this has helped me to challenge my thinking quite a bit. I would like to say that I have been able to reverse it but I am not at that stage yet. Perhaps in time I will start to see the good myself and even get braver with posting the bits yet hidden.
Hit the button to see who else is participating in Food for Thought this week.