I asked that you travel this journey with me and that was just the beginning. In accepting, you lead me to a better understanding of myself through your patient unravelling of years of the stuff that life had built up, not just for me but for us both. Together we peel it all away layer by layer, reducing the overall mass but intensifying the essence of what lies at the core. We grow in our togetherness, watching, learning, experimenting. We delve into the darkness of desire, finding the words and exploring what each of them means through the touch that was previously forbidden.
You wrap your hand around mine with a grip which is firm. You tell me that you have got me, that I can go anywhere and do anything and with a smile you ask where to? In doing this you free my imagination and I tell you things that I never thought I would say out loud. All those thoughts that are pushed down and withheld are suddenly released and they rise to the surface, offering themselves in maybes and what-ifs and I-was -thinkings. And you take them and play with them. Once in the air you catch them, sometimes running with them and sometimes filing them away for later use.
The journey takes you across the dips and the depths of my body and you explore it and make it your own. You pull me towards you and we grow closer and closer until at times, we merge and I become you. I exist for your word and your touch and your lead. I climb into you and fall asleep, hidden and safe from the world. And still we move, along the contours of the road we are building together. I live for the exhilaration, the anticipation, the excitement and the thrill of the unknown. Sometimes you stop and we pause looking around for a while, and we are startled to see how far we have come.
We journey without really resting and so to travel becomes something that is our default, our natural, our norm. Indeed to stop moving at times feels like an odd fit and we yearn to take off again and continue on into the unknown. Although we are moving, we know where we are. Our home becomes less about the location and more about who we are together, and therefore it moves with us as we experience these new sounds and sights and tastes. Through valleys of laughter and around lochs of tears we travel on, enjoying each and every ripple and gorge.
Sometimes we fly, high and fast, and sometimes we meander, as an olden-day train which weaves its way across the land. But we are together. Always together. We meet other travellers who tell us of the beautiful things they have seen and done, and warn us of the perils and dangers that can lay ahead; in the same way, we share with them the way the land lies in the direction we have come from and our hopes and dreams for where we are going. And my senses are heightened, the colours brighter, the aromas more fragrant, the quality of the journey enhanced by what seeing it together means.
Some days are tough and it seems the route we have chosen is one with struggles but we journey on, inspired by the immensity of a life that is waiting to be discovered and uncovered. We learn and we grow together, sometimes hardly seeming to move at all and sometimes retracing our steps and enjoying the familiarity of a place we have visited before. So when I asked you to take this journey with me, I did not know what I was asking. I did not realise the beauty, the enormity, the completeness of what to travel with you would mean.