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Being Beautiful

Orig-Metamorphosis-3

More and more I feel that I am changing. I feel that I am able to escape from some of the poorer ideas that life leaves you with and indulge my emotions in the more positive ones. I guess it is because so much of how you see yourself is made of how you feel about who you are and much less about how you actually are. I would say that this goes for personality, behaviour and physical appearance for me, but it is definitely the case that someone else seeing the positives and reinforcing those, has helped.

Being beautiful, either inside or out, is not something that I have ever really felt secure in. ย I tend to be very self-critical and the way I feel about my personality and my body can affect my general demeanour during a day. This is a fact, but it is yet another one that I will beat myself up for, so I lose out in having those feelings in the first place, and then in feeling bad about having had those feelings in the second place. Living the way that we do now has meant that increasingly the focus on everything has been much more positive – happy people tend to do this with each other I think. It also means that there is a structure with rules and rituals that help to support the positive behaviours and give less attention to the negative ones, and this has been a huge help.

There are definitely points during the day, or often the night, when I can escape from the things that pull me down and enjoy being someone a little different. Someone beautiful, someone worthwhile, someone who is even worthy of the attention that is being bestowed upon them. There are other times too, that I am in this space for much longer periods, and this happens especially when we are just the two of us, with no distractions and we are able to escape for extended periods into our own little world together. So having been challenged on my negativity towards myself has been a big part of being able to leave it, at least in part, behind.

Another thing that I think has brought about a change is the people who I spend a lot of time conversing with now. These tend to be other people in similar dynamics as me who are also very positive people. They are people who think about the relationships that they have, who are grateful for them, and who are used to being honest and being held accountable. We might joke about topping each other, but in reality we will challenge things that don’t seem to be helpful, as well as offering support. To this end, I have received a lot of positive comments here about my posts and about the content within them. Sometimes compliments can feel that they are given more than as a response than as a genuinely meaningful comment, but the honesty and openness that a lot of us share here means that somehow a deeper level of trust is formed.

I don’t think that to accept yourself and embrace your positives is ever a place which is easy to remain in as a constant, as life is just not like that and neither is human nature. I do think that it is something that I have had help to improve at though and my thinking and perception has altered. I suppose I would see myself not as beautiful, but in having a beauty which can be seen by others, and is slowly emerging as far as I see myself. I know that Sir sees my beauty and he is sure to tell me about it often; in accepting myself I am pleasing him and that viewpoint has helped me. He is careful not to push things too far, but to create opportunities for me which will reinforce what he sees by being more open about that, and this is something that it turns out has been helpful to me.

Self acceptance is a huge part of feeling good about yourself and I think that the more open and exposed you allow yourself to become, the more that the feedback from others can feel honest. Validation is important to people and usually this is concerned with wanting the positives to be validated rather than the negatives, or at the very least to be able to share the good and to be supported with addressing and changing the bad. I feel in some senses that this journey is a sort of metamorphosis as I seem to be transforming very slowly into a slightly different, slightly better, slightly (dare I say it) more beautiful version of myself.

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21 thoughts on “Being Beautiful

  1. since we first starting talking… I read a change in you … it is delightful to see such a stunning butterfly unfurl her glorious wings x

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Definition of Beautiful: see missy’s post of Being Beautiful.

    Personally, I think your beauty shines through not only your posts, but His Lordship’s as well. Not just the pictures, but the way His love and devotion to your well-being is depicted. Being the recipient of such lavish attention can seem so daunting when all the pesky demons start messing with your mind. It’s bad enough when we doubt our own inner beauty, but when someone we love takes the time to point out how much they adore your submission; panic often ensues. “I’m not worthy” is the worst thing we beat ourselves up with. Being beautiful is accepting the domination with grace and gratitude knowing He sees beauty in everything you do.

    Liked by 4 people

  3. I’m not sure how long I’ve followed you for, but I have formed an opinion of what and who you are. I find you to be a deep thinker whose view of the world is often positive. You are supportive of others. I think you are loving and kind. You appear to be trustworthy and responsible. I could go on, but ultimately what am I saying? I’m saying that I think you are a beautiful person. It shines through all you write. It would be lovely to actually meet you–I would feel honoured. Have a wonderful day!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Awww reading that made me really emotional (good submissive tears ๐Ÿ˜Š). Thank you so luv for you kind comments. They really mean a lot and I would be honoured to meet you in person too if that every came about. โค๏ธ

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Hope this comes across well but here goes….

    One day I need to fight WP and write a post on my philosophy of “Older, Weaker, Slower” but, until then, let’s talk about how it applies here. You, I and everyone here over about the age of 24 are getting older, weaker and slower. Before that things are on the upswing, afterwards there is an ever steeper decline. Ladies tend to focus their attention more on the physical side and worry.

    I understand that but I’ve known some amazing ladies, one comes to mind immediately. She married a much older man at a young age. He was noted for patience, work ethic and wisdom. They raised an impressive batch of kids and had a life full of love. She never stopped learning, loving or growing as a person. Sadly, she passed just over two years ago. Though she was in her 80’s she had a vitality and way that 18 year olds wouldn’t appreciate and could only wish for if they did. Miss her and still help take care of her homeplace.

    My reasoning here is simple. Yep, you are getting older, weaker and slower. (Don’t fret, so am I.) You describe a man who loves looking at you. A family that longs to be with you. Your innate wisdom and skill grows ever more evident as others have noted. You shouldn’t worry, it appears that you are gorgeous to all.

    Liked by 3 people

  5. “I suppose I would see myself not as beautiful, but in having a beauty which can be seen by others, and is slowly emerging as far as I see myself.”

    YES YES YES! I know I’m not beautiful by the worlds view of beauty but I am beautiful to those that matter. I don’t believe they are looking through rose colored glasses but they are seeing my true beauty both inside and out. I think the world teaches us to look through muck colored glasses and distorts our vision of ourselves. Those that love us and see us truly can help us clean or exchange our “glasses” for a more accurate and loving perspective.

    Liked by 2 people

    • You are right Beth and I like your analogy of the glasses. I can see your beauty and it really does shine out. I wonder why others can miss that in people so easily. Perhaps it is the vulnerability we show more here? I wonder if I am just more honest here and less guarded so people can see closer to the real me?

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Beauty is so much more than what’s on the outside. We as a society appear to give so much value to the ‘selfie’- at what point did it become normal to show off a pouting and overly made-up self portrait to a world which now appears to idolise looks, no matter how false and faked, and overlook the beauty of what people have inside? Your writing is beautiful and it reflects what is inside you – intelligence, wisdom, passion, wit, fun and love. His Lordship obviously sees more than we are able to, and your love for each other shines through in your writing. Beauty isn’t just about looks. But when you are happy, fulfilled, and appreciated, what is inside shines through on the outside as well.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Awww thanks kitten. I should take a snap chat of my happy face and post it for everyone to comment on ๐Ÿ˜‰. The wonders of the selfie have been lost on me but you make a good point. I think our lives have become judged by what you see on someone’s social media feed. Today we are going for a hike so if we take a picture of us at the top and post it, everyone will think we are a great family who do loads together. Very deceptive.

      Like

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